It flies and flies and flies

09/12/2011

Sometimes, it’s like I forget she’s a big girl. Sometimes, it’s like I want to forget.

Then I look at a picture like this one I took yesterday.

m purple 568x850 It flies and flies and flies

And this one, from a couple of weeks ago.

411 It flies and flies and flies

And I realize, there’s no getting around it. She’ll be nine at the end of this month. Nine.

Holy hell.

In just a year there will be another digit to contend with. But fuck me, it’s already too big a number as far as I’m concerned. Too big and crushing and impossible. Yesterday she was in pull-ups and gnawing on icy teething rings. Yesterday she was wearing onesies and her head was covered in a static-y fuzz of down-like hair. Yesterday I was breastfeeding her and reading Goodnight Moon and Runaway Bunny aloud each night as she lolled sleepily in my arms.

Every yesterday aches in my heart. Every yesterday feels real and alive in my mind, as if it were today.

And every today is gone too soon.

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  • http://twitter.com/karensugarpants Karen Sugarpants

    You know what though? It just gets better.  Dylan (12 nearly 13) is such an awesome kid and we have a lot of fun hanging out. I hope that doesn’t change with adolescence. It goes so damn fast. She’s a great kid, T. :)

  • Issa Crazy

    I miss yesterday. At the same time, tomorrow can be kinda cool too. I like seeing how they are as they get bigger. The amazing people they are becoming.

    Then again, when my oldest turns 10 in December, I will seriously cry. 

  • Anonymous

    She already looks like a teenager in that bed photo. I will shut my whoremouth now.

    • http://www.sweetney.com Sweetney

      *Punches Suzy in the shoulder. Hard.* DAMMIT, WOMAN!

  • http://lostandforgotten.wordpress.com/ Marta

    She looks so much older than 9 in the picture on the bed! God, I can’t even imagine my kids being that big. We can make them stay small forever right?

  • Gretchen Pike

    We saw her at the grocery store the other day and she was so sweet and adorable!  Totally charming girl you have.  <3

  • maggie wilkin

    This sums up my feelings exactly.  My oldest is 10 (SOB!) and my youngest is in 1st grade (DOUBLE SOB!).  Oh I miss my babies so much!  However, these ages are amazing too and they are so much fun, so I try not to be too sad.