In the past year, more couples I know have split up than at any other time in my life. A part of me thinks this makes sense. And that I think that seems to suggest something deeper about the majority of marriages I’ve ever seen or been exposed to.
Allow me to explain.
I think most of us would agree that it’s very hard to find The One. And I don’t just mean The One who we will eventually marry – I mean a true, compatible, healthy-in-the-long-term match. Because more times than I can count – in the vast majority of married couples I’ve ever met, I’d wager – the person people marry isn’t the right person for them. Or, maybe the person they marry was an alright person for them… back at age 25, when they had different values and ideas about life. But all too often it seems that, through no fault of their own, men and women alike choose to marry someone who is simply not a true, life-long healthy match for them - not someone that they can or should grow old with. I’ve seen this play out time and again. And when the match isn’t right, whatever bond originally existed between the two people who got married begins to erode over time and expose the points of incompatibility, and conflicts and resentments naturally ensue and fester. They may have thought they loved this person, believed they did with every atom of their being 10 years prior. But 10 years and a kid or two on, the cracks aren’t just showing, they’re erupting into San Andreas Fault-sized fissures.
